Family: It is such a beautiful thing to see my dad's side of the family reuniting for this wonderful season of thanks. I couldn't imagine spending my break any other way than hanging out with my cousins, aunts and uncles. Most of all, I love how happy my immediate family unit is. Through death, sadness, happiness, laughter and love, I am constantly reminded of the obvious divine placement I've been given.
Shortcomings: Now, this isn't to be taken literally...as some of my faithful followers might take it. ;) However, I have been feeling a lot lately that I'm just not good enough. Not good enough academically, spiritually, physically, emotionally, relationally...and so on. I have been having a hard time expressing myself in a way that gets my point across without seeming whiny. I don't like complaining and I don't like people feeling sorry for me. I've been doing my best to seem like a hard-ass in every situation that has come my way this semester and that has been leading me to feeling like I will never be able to live up to what I see myself being. Eh, that was kinda emo...which is not me...I'm done with the "sad" stuff.
New opportunities: I got the chance to work with the Acteens at my church on a project they do every year. It was so much fun to be in a leadership role among girls who just two years ago, I was one. What a lovely blessing to see the girls grow so much. In a bigger picture of things, I have an opportunity next semester to make the most of life. To embrace new things, meet new people, impact lives, start a new job, invest in my future, travel...etc...there are so many things. I'm praying that I am a good steward of all these opportunities.
And lastly, even though I'm sure it won't amount to anything, I'm thankful for an old friend who randomly rekindled a friendship I cherish dearly.
This such a beautiful time of year :)
Cheers
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
Tuesday, November 9, 2010
Running, chasing and more running
Lately, I have been having a lot of dreams about running.
In some dreams, I'm not running anywhere in particular, but others I've got a very distinct destination.
Some involve me struggling terribly, like I've never run a day in my life and just can't find the air, energy or stamina to take another step...but in those dreams, I never stop.
On the completely flipped side, I have had dreams where I'm running and running and running without stopping or even really having a desire to stop. Before those dreams are over, more times than not, I've found a reason to stop. Either I've seen someone I want to stop and talk to or something catches my eye. The stop is never for very long, but most of the time it's long enough to make me not want to keep running.
Are these just random dreams about me running? Or is there some type of life application that needs to be pulled from them?
I have no idea. I wish I did know. However, I know these dreams have put an intense desire to start running again in my heart. Again, I have NO idea why. I was the girl in high school soccer who always complained about having to run. But now, I just always want to run. Everywhere I go. It's so strange.
As I'm writing this, the Holy Spirit is bringing up verses that are pretty applicable to these dreams and to my spiritual life in general right now.
"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God." Hebrews 12:1-2
But I'm praying that God will reveal it all it His time.
Because right now I feel like I'm at a stand still and don't really know where to go...but wanting to get up and run full force somewhere. Strange place to be, huh?
I am, however, standing firm in the love that Jesus has for me and have been encouraged lately in knowing that His love for me is something that is never ever going to change.
So here's to running towards new goals, chasing after my Savior and more running.
In some dreams, I'm not running anywhere in particular, but others I've got a very distinct destination.
Some involve me struggling terribly, like I've never run a day in my life and just can't find the air, energy or stamina to take another step...but in those dreams, I never stop.
On the completely flipped side, I have had dreams where I'm running and running and running without stopping or even really having a desire to stop. Before those dreams are over, more times than not, I've found a reason to stop. Either I've seen someone I want to stop and talk to or something catches my eye. The stop is never for very long, but most of the time it's long enough to make me not want to keep running.
Are these just random dreams about me running? Or is there some type of life application that needs to be pulled from them?
I have no idea. I wish I did know. However, I know these dreams have put an intense desire to start running again in my heart. Again, I have NO idea why. I was the girl in high school soccer who always complained about having to run. But now, I just always want to run. Everywhere I go. It's so strange.
As I'm writing this, the Holy Spirit is bringing up verses that are pretty applicable to these dreams and to my spiritual life in general right now.
"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God." Hebrews 12:1-2
"Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last, but we do it to get a crown that will last forever. Therefore I do not run like someone running aimlessly; I do not fight like a boxer beating the air. No, I strike a blow to my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize." 1 Corinthians 9:25-27
But I'm praying that God will reveal it all it His time.
Because right now I feel like I'm at a stand still and don't really know where to go...but wanting to get up and run full force somewhere. Strange place to be, huh?
I am, however, standing firm in the love that Jesus has for me and have been encouraged lately in knowing that His love for me is something that is never ever going to change.
So here's to running towards new goals, chasing after my Savior and more running.
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